Next Tuesday is Dirty Santa night with my Bible study. My wife and I have been undisputed champs of this event for the last two years (inspiring heated battles over our gifts). The first year, our offering was a ceramic parrot; we think it was some kind of incense burner. Last year, it was a belt buckle that said, "If you don't see what you want, ask for it." But this year, I'm feeling nervous. I may have talked too much smack. There may be some real contenders for best (worst) white elephant gift.
So I'm on a pilgrimage, a sacred search. I've been combing through thrift stores on my lunch hour. I don't just want any old piece of junk. I am looking for an object of such luxurious tackiness that it would be forgivable neither in another epoch (70s cheese or 80s glitz) nor even in another cultural context (Mexico City, Bangladesh). I'm looking for the Platonic ideal of tasteless. I'm on a quest for the holy grail of kitsche.
If you have any ideas, please do share.
DB,
Hey dude. I'm back. been missin yuh. I don't have a suggestion, just wundering what's so special about Plato. Why would you give that at an party fro adults? Most folks stop playin with that stuff when they was in kinnergarden. Just aksing.
merry party
Posted by: jerry rogers | November 30, 2007 at 07:06 AM
the best one i've ever received cheers and jeers for is the year I brought one of those plastic reindeer that poops black/brown jellybeans out of the appropriate orifice when you bob one of it's limbs. four bux at walmart i think. it was fought over and laughed at for quite some time =)
Posted by: Jill | December 02, 2007 at 09:22 PM
That's genius, Jill.
Posted by: DB | December 03, 2007 at 04:43 AM
How about an Elvis Costello CD?
Posted by: holmes | December 06, 2007 at 10:33 AM
So, giv it up. How'd it go, you Dirty Santa yu? Did you pruv once agin that yu r smrter than everbudy else?
Posted by: jerry rogers | December 07, 2007 at 08:56 AM
Not this time, Jerry m'boy. I'm afraid I was schooled.
Posted by: DB | December 09, 2007 at 06:30 AM